I have not posted many entries over the last year and I hope to change that this coming year. 2006 was a wonderful year but I have not taken the time to record the wonders large and small of my year. I spend a great deal of time reflecting on my life in my head (while I am cross stitching) and never commit my thoughts to paper or to this electronic medium. Most of my reflections go unshared hence my husband's complaint that he never knows what I am thinking. So this year I am going to make a bigger effort to share my feelings and thoughts through this journal and perhaps by writing them down I will also be better able to share my thoughts verbally with those I love. In order to be successful I will initially have to make an appointment with myself each day to record my reflections until it becomes a habit or ritual.
I often wonder what my children will remember of me and realize that in many ways they will not really know me beause I haven't taken the time to share myself in any detail. They know I love them and take care of them but do they know how they took my breath away when I first looked at them? Do they know how I swell with pride at their every accomplishment?
My younger son never ceases to amaze me. He quietly sets goals and procedes to accomplish them. Perhaps in this way he is like me. I am never quite sure how seriously he takes things and then find that when it counts he takes things very seriously. That although he doesn't always tackle every situation with as much time as I would like him to he is taking care of it.
My daughter is finding out more about herself and her talents everyday and it is fun to watch her blossom. She shares her optimism and enthusiam for life with anyone who wants it. She lives life energetically. She's dramatic. She's shy. She's more talented and wonderful than she knows. She can also be very direct and blunt. She's a wonderful artist and a great storyteller. I am enjoying watching her move with great deliberation toward her goals.
My older son has recently become a father and launched me into grandparenthood about five years earlier than I expected to be there. As I watch him with his son I can see how he has matured and taken on this awesome responsibilty with grace and enthusiam. He is crafting his adult life around his family and as the circle of life continues we have pulled closer together. After the years of pulling away to become his own person it is wonderful to have him back again.
I am so very thankful for my wonderful husband and children and so very proud of all of them. What a great way to start out the new year, reflecting about those people closest to you and giving thanks for all the love in my life.